It's funny because I made all the money, right? I made a ton of money, and it was not freedom. I was making so much money and yet chained to my desk.
It's funny because I made all the money, right? I made a ton of money, and it was not freedom. I was making so much money and yet chained to my desk. I look at Donald Trump, politics aside, with great admiration. – Jillian Sidoti
Today, Vivien Roggero is joined by Jillian Sidoti, a former attorney and business architect dedicated to helping others achieve financial freedom. Jillian, who has supported notable figures like Grant Cardone, shares her journey of redefining success beyond material wealth. She reflects on the struggles of being an entrepreneur, the cost of constantly working, and the quest for true freedom. Together, Vivien and Jillian discuss what it means to balance responsibility with freedom and how deeply personal that definition can be.
Jillian Sidoti is the co-founder of Last Life Ever. Last Life Ever was founded on the principle of "Give Before you Get," a philosophy that encompassed gratitude, intention, value, and effort, in order to attain a great life, enjoyment, and thankfulness. The company's slogan, "You owe it to your community, your family, and yourself to live the best version of your life," became their guiding light.
Join us for a transformative conversation on how to redefine freedom for yourself.
Key Topics in this Episode:
[00:33] Vivien and Jillian discuss the concept of freedom and the struggle of being constantly “on” as entrepreneurs.
[05:17] Jillian reflects on finding fulfillment beyond financial success.
[10:15] They discuss the misconceptions around freedom and the balance between responsibilities and choice.
[17:29] Jillian shares her experience transitioning from a high-stakes law firm to a more purpose-driven life.
[23:18] The impact of cultural and personal beliefs on our definition of freedom.
[25:00] Vivien and Jillian talk about balancing family, freedom, and career satisfaction.
[30:15] Jillian’s insights on the importance of time and flexibility versus financial wealth.
Jillian 00:00
It's funny because I made all the money, right like, I made a ton of money and it was not freedom. I was making so much money and yet I was chained to my desk i look at Donald Trump, politics aside, with great admiration.
Vivien 00:17
You cannot judge what someone else feels about freedom because this is their freedom, this is their heart.
Jillian 00:24
Elon Musk believes he has to save the world. He believes it is his responsibility.
Vivien 00:29
I can promise you for the fact that a lot of the expat lifestyle people that are there, there is a big part of them that are not happy. Hi, welcome to the One Film Formula podcast. Today I have Gillian Sidoti with me, a live business architect, former attorney, I said it, former attorney that is actually being building freedom for people through financial freedom and having to help so many entrepreneurs including Grant Cardone. Gillian, pleasure to have you here today. Excited for this interview?
Jillian 01:14
Oh, I'm glad to be here.
Vivien 01:15
So tell me, the first question that I would like to ask, which is most probably the most difficult question of this podcast, is what does personal freedom mean for you? And why is it so important that you made all those changes in your life?
Jillian 01:32
Yeah, the big thing about personal freedom is it's, it's funny because I made all the money, right like I made a ton of money and it's not it. Money is a huge aspect of it money definitely like LED is, we cannot discount, you know, the value of having money to do the things you want to do. But for my case with like the fact that I had this very successful law firm, I remember very clearly in 2018 sitting at my desk and just wishing the whole thing would blow up because it was just, it was not freedom. I was making so much money and yet I was chained to my desk and so so freedom really is about your ability to do what you want when you want to do it in the way that you want to do it. And you know, that doesn't mean that you're not restricted because we all have responsibilities you know, I have 3 kids and those three kids have to go to school so that means you can't just get up and go to Ibiza one weekend or something like I've never been to Ibiza, but that was the first thing I could think of. So you just can't go out, you know, get up and go party you know, you also have to be a responsible citizen so again, you can't get up and go to Ibiza and do a bunch of drugs and you know, because that's not freedom either that's actually a different kind of, you know, slavery will even call it because you're a slave to drugs and party life. So freedom is truly, you know, understanding what your restrictions are and being OK with those restrictions and then and then working within that framework to build the the life of your dreams.
Vivien 03:22
I like that i like that. So I have actually created a a quote about freedom that I I will give you right now. Freedom is not doing whatever you want whenever you want. That is actually chaos. Freedom is a result of the choice and focuses on doing the things that bring us a sense of freedom, joy and purpose.
Jillian 03:46
Yeah you know what? That is such a great way to look at it and because because you said the best part of that was the last part you said about purpose, because if you don't have purpose, everything else doesn't matter. Nothing matters without the purpose.
Vivien 04:01
Yeah, that's Jim Carrey said it recently like we don't matter. And it's so freeing because we always think, you know, I've, I've always seen that we have those big carriers, we have those big title, we have those money, we have those things. But all of that, it doesn't really make you who you are and it doesn't necessarily give you purpose or freedom. And, and, and one a person that I know, for example, for him, freedom is actually going to work nine to five and being home with his kids at six every day and taking care of them until they go to sleep. That's freedom for him.
Jillian 04:42
Beautiful. Yeah, absolutely. I couldn't agree more. Like, I mean, I, I have to say this like there have been many times in my entrepreneurial career where I wish I had, I wish I had that, where it was like I go to a job, I do what I'm I have to do to make the money I need to make. And then I come home and it's I leave the job at, at at work and it doesn't follow me home and you know, when you're an entrepreneur, that's one of those freedoms you don't have your work always follows you wherever you.
Vivien 05:17
No, that's no when you're an entrepreneur, like there is no stop button there is no, you leave it at the door that that doesn't exist. That doesn't exist. At the same time, as an entrepreneur myself, you know, it's like it brings you another type of freedom, which is the control of your life also.
Jillian 05:41
For sure, for sure. I, I, I do think that, I mean, I prefer an entrepreneurial lifestyle, but I, I remember not too long ago, I used to tell people that I had two dream jobs. One was a Tiki bar bartender, right like on the beach somewhere and, and just bartending. And, and the great thing about that is that, you know, most people who come to a tiki bar on vacation, they're, you're never going to see them again they're in a good mood, right and, and you're, you're giving them a drink to lift their spirits. And then the second one was Starbucks barista, because again, you know, people are usually coming to you in the morning, they're grumpy, you're giving them something that's going to lift their spirits and, and then they leave and you get to go home too. And that's it and that's the end of the transaction.
Vivien 06:42
Ok, OK, Starbucks barista i'm.
Jillian 06:46
Sorry, exactly.
Vivien 06:47
I have been to a couple of Starbucks, even if I don't drink coffee, and I don't really like Starbucks. Not the place where the people are treated the nicest in term of being a barista, you know?
Jillian 06:59
Like, yeah, you know, I think it's all relative, right because I used to live in this town and in I used to live in this town this, this, I wouldn't call it a small town, but I lived in a town in Southern California that was not, you know, Los Angeles or San Diego or a major city. And I remember I pulled up to the Starbucks drive through and the woman who was serving me my coffee, I, I said to her, I don't even know what brought me to do this, but I, I, you know, I would see her very often and I said, you know, you seem to be here the longest and you also seem to be in charge. How did you end up, you know, with this job like what, what brought you to to being a Starbucks store manager? And she told me that she used to work somewhere else i don't, I don't know where else she told me she works, but she used to work somewhere else. She started working at Starbucks because she had she, she, her, her shift was like four thirty in the morning to like ten thirty in the morning. So she was done with work by ten thirty in the morning. She has a kid who has autism and so that gave her the opportunity to make sure you know, her kid was home and spend time with her kid after school. She said the people were super nice she got to know the regular customers and they tipped her well and so I, I think that might even be the where I got the idea of like, oh, I want to be a Starbucks barista because that to me sounds like ultimate freedom.
Vivien 08:35
Yeah, it's it sounds really good. Sounds really good, yeah.
Jillian 08:38
Right.
Vivien 08:40
You know, part of the the work that I've done with people is about redefining what freedom is and in a way what I've realized and then I've said it in several podcast episodes, we have this kind of vision of what freedom is based on what social media or Hollywood sell us. A lot of people saying freedom is having a private plane or having a laptop on the beach and and so on and so on. The truth is this sounds much more like freedom for me than being with a laptop on the beach. And if you ever have been on a beach with a laptop working, you know that's not the place you want to be.
Jillian 09:23
Oh, my goodness. I will tell you, I went, went to a hypnotherapist in the middle of all of my, you know, stress and anxiety and working a ton. I went to a hypnotherapist and the question she asked me stayed with me forever and that question was, I want you to remember the last time you went on vacation without your computer. And I couldn't do it, you know, I, I couldn't do it and it was like, it, it, that, that really spoke to me because you're absolutely correct like that's not freedom. Go working on a beach with your laptop while you're, you know, and your kids are like, mommy, mommy, build a sandcastle with me and you're like, I just got to finish this one thing it's not, it's not freedom.
Vivien 10:15
I have another one like this. When was the last weekend you didn't pick up your cell phone to look at your email or notifications?
Jillian 10:25
Yeah, yeah, yeah. For me, I, I mean, I was able to get out of the rat race so I can say like my last weekend, I didn't look at my notifications, you know, like even this weekend, I really didn't do much i wasn't feeling great yesterday so I kind of just like watched tik tok all day, to be perfectly honest with you. But but yeah, there was definitely a time in my life where I was, I was always looking at my phone constantly, constantly, constantly, constantly. And for work purposes, not for entertainment purposes.
Vivien 11:05
Yeah, well, and and so, you know, looking at all of that little stress, all that part of your life where you big successful lawyer and then like, OK, I'm going to burn out if I continue. What was the past how did you move and change your? You know your measure of what success and fulfilment is?
Jillian 11:32
That's a good question. Honestly, what ended up happening for me is I got a rude awakening, which was great. At the time it didn't seem so great, but at the end of the day it was. It was great. What had happened was I had a business partner, the partner at the law firm who actually really did me dirty. That's the best way to put it. And it that resulted in, you know, threatened lawsuits and a bunch of other stuff. What I was able to do was I was able to get a lawyer. I got the lawyer the lawyer basically got rid of the partner and I was with for very, very, very little money, like an obscenely low amount of money i was able to get rid of the partner and when that was at the height of COVID, this was the summer of 2020 And I then the business actually started doing really even after he left, the business was doing really well. But I turned to my other partner who happened to be a woman and I said to her, what do you want to do like I asked her what do you want to do because I was very concerned about my employees and her and, and that partner i was concerned about them i wanted to make sure that they were being taken care of. I knew my employees themselves were terrified about, you know, employment, especially because we're in the middle of COVID. So I had and, and now, now this office, with the exception of very few were all moms. They were all moms who had kids that were at home from because of COVID and they weren't in school, so they all had to be home so we all had to work from home. Everything changed for us. And that particular that partner said to me, Jillian, I just want to go back to being a stay at home mom. Like she didn't want to work anymore. And I said, OK, then we have to, then we have to work with that if you don't want to do this anymore, I don't want to do this anymore. It's time to figure out what else we can do and sometimes, sometimes you're just not brave enough to do it yourself you got to have that push and I had that push and the push at the time seemed like the biggest tragedy in the world like I did not sleep, literally did not get sleep for like 2 months straight it was like, you know, two hours of sleep at night, just full of anxiety, stress. And the minute that, you know, solution came, it was like all of the stress was lifted off and it was like, oh, I don't need to be a lawyer. I don't need to do this. You know how many people out there aren't lawyers? A lot. So guess what i don't need to be a lawyer either. And now and I have this, I have this asset that I did kill myself to build. So let's find out what it's worth and sell it to somebody and that's what I did.
Vivien 14:44
Yeah, there is more non lawyers and there is lawyers.
Jillian 14:48
Yeah, exactly.
Vivien 14:50
You have a huge.
Jillian 14:50
Pool of choices. Yeah, exactly. So and that's so that was that that made it really, really easy.
Vivien 14:58
Yeah, I mean, COVID was a great in a certain way was a great equalizer for everyone. You are the same constraints wherever you are, whatever your position are most people and in Europe it was it was even more drastic I would say than in US on that most people actually got out of the city. They got to like in, in, in, in Belgium, there was an explosion of houses with gardens. People wanted to buy houses with garden in France. People were leaving Paris and leaving the big city to live in smaller cities, to have a bigger house, bigger life and all of that. And so there was this kind of reset also about, you know, what is life and what is success and and you know all that not only the rat race per southeast, because the people were stealing still in their job they were just working from home, but they discovered a better way of, you know, working and living by being at home at your work yes, but how many hours do we invest in coffee machine talks?
Jillian 16:21
We.
Vivien 16:23
They they just.
Jillian 16:25
Pointless yeah, And if you.
Vivien 16:28
Want to socialize you can still do it like I have been working before as a consulting VP for an Indonesian company i live in Taiwan and my teams were Singapore, India, Indonesia worked perfectly well. Visit them once a month something, we have a nice meeting and that's all. People were happy they were working they could have time, more time with their family they have, you know, and, and I think that's one of the things that you said, like all those mums, what they wanted, it was security, but it was also the time with the family like this is and and that's, that would bounce to the question but for me, it's one of the misconception about freedom is like money is the criteria for freedom. But then, as you said, you know when you were having a lot of money, being a lawyer, you are not feeling free at all.
Jillian 17:29
No, no.
Vivien 17:30
Not at all. I think a lot of time and and I plead guilty on that. I've been, you know, in high position in in startups and company and you have your CEO that comes to you and you need to do that. We want to do that. Can you do it? And you're like, yes, I'm most probably when you say that you don't even know and, and I think one of the best thing that when you have freedom, like real freedom, you have the ability to say, I don't know, you have the ability to choose, admit what you know and what you don't and, you know, react honestly about it.
Jillian 18:19
Mm, hmm. Mm hmm. Just be yeah, be honest about it. And and that's, that was that was a very a big difficulty for me in, in being a lawyer is that you, you couldn't. The good thing, the good thing about the type of law I practiced was I wasn't going up against other lawyers most of the time i didn't do litigation i did corporate work, you know, for, for again, you mentioned Grant Cardone for him. I worked on all his funds like I, he had another in house lawyer who did all his litigation and things like that i didn't have to deal with any of those things. It was funny too, because I tell this story from time to time when in the thick of working for Grant Cardone at one point in time, one of his guys offered me the opportunity to move to Florida and be their in house counsel and I was like, you guys work too much no thank you. They they work tirelessly. They work way more than I am comfortable with over there so I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no you couldn't pay me enough money to move there, sorry, and be in house, counsel.
Vivien 19:32
Yeah, he is known for that. He is, yeah.
Jillian 19:35
No, I he, he is. What you see online with him is exactly who he is. He works that much he you can, he said he has a phrase you can't outwork me he's not kidding. He's not kidding. He's very sincere about that.
Vivien 19:50
Yeah, I believe i believe I've been following him quite a lot at one point and yeah, this, this man is. He's an insane worker. Like, there is several people like this, like they used to be Kobe Bryant before he died, you know, like, insane. This guy was like in a basketball court he would outwork anyone michael Jordan, those people that just share brute force. Let's be honest yeah. But you know, yeah i'm always asking myself, are they really free? And for some of them.
Jillian 20:31
It's funny, yeah, because it's, it's, it's their brand of freedom, right? Like it's what they want to do i mean, look at look at whether you, whatever you think about American politics, I look at Donald Trump, politics aside, with great admiration. The man is a 78 year old man who's out campaigning to become president of the United States again he doesn't have to. He already did it he proved it. He proved that he, his billionaire self could become a could become president of the United States. He's out there killing himself to try to do it again he doesn't need, he has the money. He has more money than, you know, Grant Cardone he, he doesn't need, he does not need to do any of this and he's doing it. So I think it's just different for different people i wouldn't be doing what Donald Trump's doing that sounds exhausting i wouldn't be doing what Kamala Harris is doing either. It also sounds exhausting.
Vivien 21:36
Yeah, yeah, yeah i mean, look at the Elon Musk for example.
Jillian 21:40
Oh, another one yeah, exactly. Yeah, I mean, that's their definition of freedom. Elon Musk believes he has to save the world. He believes it is his responsibility. I'm I again, it's something I completely admire. Not for me.
Vivien 21:59
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That, that the point is like one of the big point about freedom that I wish people understood more. It is entirely personal. You cannot judge what someone else feels about freedom because this is their freedom this is their heart. This is not yours, this is not mine, this is theirs. And so the problem is a lot of people have lost the ability to look at what it is exactly for them and more looking at what others are selling them that it should be. And I'm, I was a luxury with my wife who generally who is Indonesian would generally go to Bali once a year for a month. I can promise you. I can promise you for the fact that a lot of the expat lifestyle people that are there, there is a big part of them that are not happy. They are not as happy as they think they would be when they arrive because they didn't realize that what they were looking at as a freedom was not what they were selled on.
Jillian 23:18
Yeah. Oh, for sure. It's funny you mentioned Bali because I went to Bali just, I don't know, six months ago and, and, and it's so funny because it is like a third world location, but never, I, I, I never once felt unsafe except, you know, if a moped was going to hit me, that was the biggest risk to me was, was his mopeds of racing.
Vivien 23:47
The biggest risk in Bali is not the Indonesian on scooter, it's actually the foreigner on scooter. I had so many risk of accident because there is people driving without a license that have never driven a motorcycle, that rent one, and that just drive like insane people.
Jillian 24:05
Oh, yeah, no, that was, that was not for me that was not going to be me on those mopeds i was comfortably in a car. But but yeah, so that was to me was the biggest risk so so you saw this like objectively, you saw this like poverty, but you also saw this love of their religion that seemed very peaceful. You know, it, it involves flowers and spice it and, you know, spices. We were, you know, Bali, although Indonesia is like a lot of Muslims, that Bali is very Hindu and that it seemed very, very peaceful like it didn't seem like a, a massive obligation to them like that they loved being part of this religion. Every, every car that I got in had like the little flower, you know, basket offering in in the car. My, we had a, we had a driver who was just so happy to meet tourists and drive them around and, you know, make 50$ a day like 50$ a day was a great amount of money to them. And I, I found this, it like this isn't unique to Bali this is very much a I, I think the Western world doesn't understand this phenomenon, which is like when we were in Tanzania, my partner Jeff and I, and my business partner, he actually was a lawyer too. And you should definitely, if you want to talk to somebody who knows something about freedom and surviving and, and finding freedom after survival, you should definitely talk to him i, I should introduce you guys. But my, my business partner Jeff and I, we went to Tanzania actually to buy a safari lodge. And we didn't end up buying the safari lodge for a variety of reasons, but we went there to buy it. And when we were there, we were talking to the owner of the Safari Lodge and he straight up told. We said, OK, one of the things we're going to do when we come here is we're probably going to double the salaries of all the employees because we can afford to and we want to be able. We want to do that. And he just looked us dead in the eye and said, do not do that. That means nothing to them. Like they don't want it. They want time. If if somebody's you know, grandmother dies, you better give them ample time to go mourn that loss. That's what they want they want time they don't they, they want time they want time with their families they want time off. They do not want more money. And so that's, that was very interesting as well. And oddly enough, that very guy who we're going to buy the safari lodge from ended up being in Bali when we were there. And we, we all hung out in Bali, which is just so ironic but but yeah, so it's, it's, it's funny what freedom means to different people because, you know, you look at the, the Elon Musk's the grant Cardones, the Donald Trump's the, the, you know it, Or even even people like Richard Branson, who's now, you know, dedicated his life to philanthropy. It's just, it's just a different way of being. And it's a, it's, it's different, a different definition for every single person out there. And, and, and to be honest, I think the definition changes with you as you, as, as you grow over time, right like your, your definition of your own personal freedom changes because I've spent the last three years, to be perfectly honest, I sold my law firm, I sold it in 2020 so 4 years ago. And actually four years ago yesterday exactly. And I in selling it, I ended up not like doing anything for a long time and then volunteering my life away and completely throwing myself into volunteer situations and now that's all that's all gotten old now i want to go back to making money now i'm like, OK, four years is long enough. I want to make some money now.
Vivien 28:36
Now I won't come back on Bali a bit later, but on what you said, it's true because look at kids. Kids are the definition of freedom. The reason why they don't?
Jillian 28:48
Know that though, do they?
Vivien 28:50
They don't. But if you look at it, they also don't have an idea of what life should be. They don't have an idea of I want to be on the beach. They don't have. They're discovering so I think also a big part of freedom is the, the discovering part. The more we discover new thing, the more freedom we gain. At least that's what I feel you know, I've moved country several times i lived in Indonesia, Germany was born in France, now in Taiwan, visited, I don't know, twenty thirty countries by now. Every time you know, you have solving something new. It's freedom for me. It's a part of it. And then and I love your story about that. Yes, the moped is definitely and to be honest, all over Indonesia and every place that I've been, people are really, really nice. It's it's a really nice population and it's a third world country in many ways. It's also developed countries in other ways like if you ever go to Jakarta, you will understand what I mean it's like there is a worst traffic jam in the world. There is big fine tech there is a lot of VCs money, there is a lot of companies it's but there is one particularity that most people don't know about Indonesia. It has actually 6 official religions.
Jillian 30:26
Oh, is there really?
Vivien 30:28
Yes, and they are officials, man.
Jillian 30:32
Well, yeah, and, and I don't know about Taiwan. Well, I I suppose, like Europe doesn't have official, most countries in Europe don't have official religions.
Vivien 30:43
Most country in the world doesn't have official religions.
Jillian 30:45
Don't have official, Yeah, because the United States doesn't have an official like, I mean, that's what our First Amendment's all about is freedom of religion so.
Vivien 30:53
So France neither. But if you go to Vatican, yes, the Vatican has an official religion. Yeah, if you if you go into several countries still. But this is the only country in the world that has 6 official regions. And as much as the majority of the population is Muslims in Bali, especially in certain parts is Hinduism. And they are what what you were referring to is the offering baskets. So they, they change every every morning. Like they do that every day they have this offering basket and they have rituals that are incredible, like melokat, which is a cleansing ritual that I've had the luxury to do twice. Those are beautiful things to do, but they are for them as important As for you to eat. Like they don't question it. It's just this is what their life is about this is a rhythm of their life this is their freedom. They're not constrained to do it they just do it because for them that's important. And and that's one of the thing that I would say I've seen the the in Europe, the clean of Christians, you know, Catholicism and all that. There is far less importance to religion in some community and then on others there is another really strong importance of religion. And this has been fighting while in Indonesia in places like Bali, it's like peaceful. It's a surprisingly peaceful whatever your religion has, no one cares. Everyone is having been happy and and peacefully and that that was like amazingly beautiful for me it's like how people and you can be white piercing and everything as long as you're respectful, you will have amazingly grateful people in front of you for everything that you're giving them. And what you said about the money is also one thing important to like people think people want money and that's not necessarily true. What they want is respect first. That's so the first thing is like respect. And as you said, for some of them is they need, they need time because if something happened and all that, but for me, time is also giving time is a form of respect to the person you're like, OK, you need something here, I'm here it's a partnership. And so there is this, I don't know if you know that, but there was this study that was made, don't remember which country, but they did two things. They took employees and on some of them they increase the salary. On the other, another company, they increase the flexibility of work and the time, freedom to have holidays and all that. The company with higher salaries had higher turnover. People were leaving this company more. The reason why is because they only look at the money and say, Oh yeah, I have more money, but I work so hard. Well, let's see if another company will give you give me more money than that. And they found another company that give them more money. And so they're like, OK, we'll have the same condition but have more money. The people want more time and more flexibility they're like, no, I'm in comfortable environment yeah, I could have made more money, but it's comfortable. It's I have freedom in my world and say, yeah, that was that was a big thing you know, it's like, oh, always thought about money, money, money. That's not what the true freedom was about for people.
Jillian 34:45
Right well, and, and the, The funny thing is, as you mentioned, a religion and I, I, I happen to be Catholic and I live in Puerto Rico right now and Puerto Rico is a very Catholic country. The issue we have, my family has is that all of the churches here are, don't have any English masses at all. So we, I mean, we've gone a couple times, we've sat there i can understand, like I speak Spanish, my, my kids and my husband, my husband does not, my kids speak a little bit. So it's, it's, it's, it's a challenge, especially in a church situation. So we haven't been to church and actually we find that to be very, very restrictive. You you think going to a Catholic Church, it is everything against freedom, but there is great freedom in knowing that you have a safe and maybe not so much safe, but a comfortable place to practice your religion. And it's not comfortable when you don't speak language. So I think that's.
Vivien 35:55
That's a great point so whatever your religion are, I think having a place of worship if you're religious is a really important thing.
Jillian 36:09
Absolutely, yeah.
Vivien 36:11
And and you know, 1 don't know if you know about this building, but there is one building in the in the world that is like this in Berlin and Germany, they have they built religion center where you have a place for Catholics, place for Jews, less for Muslims, and a place for any other religion that want to worship in the same building. Yeah, that that is incredible because like, I have studied several religions and been practicing some of them. I know I'm basically here. I, I, I'm like you, I don't have a, a church here. So mine is in Jakarta. So we have online services and when we go there, we, we go visit. But the, you know, the, the ability to mix religion and, and spirituality in a peaceful way is incredible for me. Yeah, it just like you're giving freedom to different kind of people, different kind of ideas.
Jillian 37:40
Yeah, absolutely and and that, and that's the thing too i mean, that's one of the great things about living in the free world is you get to choose whatever religion you want whenever you want you could switch whenever you want. I mean, I don't know if that's good for your soul, to be honest, but you could. I, I, who am I to judge do whatever you want as long as you're not hurting anybody.
Vivien 38:02
Yeah, for for me, the, I won't go into the story here because it's a long story, but I studied a lot on spirituality and religion and all that. I was not specially raised into religion. I still had practice and all of that and Bible studies and all that so if you ask me Bible studies, I I can, I can read a lot, tell you a lot about it, but it doesn't it it didn't when I was a kid it didn't really work with me because the way it was practice at that time were not making me free was actually something that didn't give me freedom. And a big part of it was because no one really told me about what spirituality is and what religion it actually is. They told you this is a book. Respect the book. That's it. Listen to what we and that didn't that didn't work with me i was someone who I've I always wanted to understand things, so I had to study where it's coming from where is the Bible coming from where is the religions coming from what's the story behind it what is what does it means to actually be engrossed into it and to actually feel as part of me is religious. But yeah, but I did graced a bit on that but but part of my freedom for me was the fact that I could actually explore and learn. That's how I found religious freedom or spirituality freedom, which I think it's an important part of, you know, being comfortable in your faith. So as you said, being religion, being, I don't know, I, I remember Cancer Society, you were on the board for that, you know, something that touched you. That's what make also giving back even more valuable and more more purposeful. Yeah, as you said, it's not about giving money. Money is one thing, yes, but more than money is what impact are you giving?
Jillian 40:25
The thing is, you can give away money all day anywhere you want and it having make no impact whatsoever i mean that that actually, that's actually something you really have to start thinking about too when you start making money, when you have the money to give away and, and it all, you know what The thing is, I say you can always give something. You can always give something, whether it's time, talent oregon, tithe, you know money. But I think we do have a responsibility to make sure that our money is going to the right places and I, I used to be one of these people who just be like, oh, you asked me for it i gave it to you and then didn't really think much about it. And then, you know, you start, you know, the older you get, the more you realize, like I won't pick on any particular charity, but you, you realize, like just write, you know, writing a check to any old charity is it may not be the best use of your money. This goes back to to point number one of purpose what's your purpose? And does does point number five fit within that purpose?
Vivien 41:32
Yeah.
Jillian 41:33
So, you know, it's funny because I started off this conversation talking about how I spent, you know, years volunteering after I sold my law firm before I even sold the law firm for two years, I volunteered at a food pantry and the jobs I did at the food pantry were like, so they were menial tasks. I ended up, I ended up working at that food pantry for four years. And the only reason why I stopped working there was because I moved from California to Puerto Rico and I'm still super great friends with all the people who work there and and volunteered there. That was the best time of my life was going in and literally putting to together boxes of bread and cooking and I cooked breakfast for my first two years i cooked breakfast the second two years I I was in charge of giving away baked goods. And that was the best time in my life and it was such, it was, it was, it was hard work from the perspective of there was a lot of lifting and moving and standing and physical labor. But it, that was the best time of my life. And, and it involved no money, no money, just me showing up on Wednesday mornings and, you know, at 6:00 in the morning and, and staying till ten AM and just giving away bread. So yeah.
Vivien 42:56
I always say if someone thinks something about you, the first thing is it doesn't really matter, the second is it's not your responsibility and the 3rd place is anyway, it's not true.
Jillian 43:20
Yeah, exactly. And even if it is true, who cares?
Vivien 43:25
No, but it cannot be true in a certain way because it's only a thinking. So the the the way we think is relative to our own vision of the world so from our own formatting, from our own experience, for all of that, it is not a truth. It is an objectivity. It could never be a truth because two people will think differently because they have two different frameworks so how could it be a truth?
Jillian 43:55
Right.
Vivien 43:57
So it's just an objectivity about you, it's not the truth.
Jillian 43:59
Yeah, absolutely. You couldn't be more right that's correct. Yeah, for sure.
Vivien 44:05
When you think like that, you know, it's like, it's freeing because like, OK, whatever. Yeah, that's your objectivity sure. But that's not true. Well, then whatever. Doesn't matter yeah.
Jillian 44:20
Exactly it. And it, it doesn't matter, you know, like at the end of the day, what any human really thinks of you there, there might be some humans that think certain things of you that matter to you, but most, you know, I, I love the phrase of it's a Doctor Seuss phrase those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.
Vivien 44:43
I love that sentence that's that's yeah, beautiful. Some beautiful sentence. I wish I'd heard that one when I was like three four years old. I would remember it today, but this is like this is a great sentence. Now one last question. If someone were to start their path to freedom today, what is the one thing you told them to do?
Jillian 45:15
The one thing I would tell them to do is if they want, if they want real freedom, they have to write that down and tell and and and and write down what that looks like to them. Write it down write it down, write it down. Because until you write it down, it's not going to become it's not going to become real.
Vivien 45:32
Yeah, I I think that's a really important one, you know, to always have this and and people use visualization board, they use toasted, they use whatever they want, but having it somewhere make it real. I love that. I love that. Well, Jillian was really a pleasure to do this podcast with you. Amazing discussion. And I wish we had more time. I wish we had so much more time. I would have been in a really long discussion but yeah, it's such a pleasure.
Jillian 46:05
No, thank you so much i love doing it and you know, we should get together again soon i'll have you on my podcast when we start booking again.
Vivien 46:14
Anytime just shoot me a message I will definitely join.